My Childhood Is Over


For so long, I thought I had this great plan for my life after high school, go to the University of Michigan and then become a dermatologist. Anytime someone would ask me where I wanted to go to college or what I wanted to be I would recite that back to them. However, now as college is only a few months away I realize I don't actually know what I want to do with my life. Michigan is out of the equation not only because I was deferred, but also because I can't pay that much for my undergraduate if im going to grad school too. I'm stuck going to Oakland or Wayne, and because of that the first part of my plan that I had since elementary school had to be thrown out. With the first step of my plan gone, it got me thinking about the rest of it. Do I even want to be a dermatologist anymore? I started looking into the airforce because I've always wanted to fly a plane, but it's an eight-year commitment which is way too long. Also, I would probably end up with a spouse in the military and I don't really want that for myself. For a time I didn't even want to go to college, but I only think I was considering that because going to college means the end of my childhood and the beginning of being an adult. I'm not ready to start the journey to a 9-5 job, four kids, and a house in the suburbs. I still feel like I'm 15. I often wish I could go back to elementary school and relive those years of my life. I think not having a senior year really impacted my readiness for college. I needed the closure of my childhood that senior year would have provided. Too much is happening too fast. 



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